In•jus•tice

(ˌ)in-ˈjə-stəs : absence of justice : violation of right or of the rights of another : UNFAIRNESS

Merriam-Webster Dictionary

Was the first word given to us – a bunch of newly arrived overseas students, in an Academic English preparation class, at the DEEP program run by NCELTR in Macquarie University back in November 1997. Our teachers, Mr. Nicholas Cope and Mr. Timothy Glover assigned each of us one word to elaborate into a short essay, as an early assessment on our English language capabilities. The word – injustice is planted deep in my memory.

Injustice was also the exact word experienced by my Professor during his captivity by the military junta in Myanmar. For 650 days, he was stripped off of his rights and accused of being a spy, while in all honesty he is the person who is most harmless to everything, the kindest and most sincere person I knew.

Although Myanmar and my country are both ASEAN members, our local news on Myanmar were limited only around the start of the coup, the arrest of Daw Suu and the Rohingya refugees. There were no other news on the country in turmoil, nor on the political prisoners, let alone on one Professor Sean Turnell. My best source of information was from my friends in Australia and from Sean’s wife’s Facebook posts. I wanted to help, but did not know how and not having any Burmese friends made this task closer to impossible. However, I believe in the power of prayers. So I prayed every day for his safety and immediate release as well as signed and recirculated a petition when one was circulated by a united Australian academics.

Upon his release in November 2022, I praised with joy and made a promise to myself that I shall pay him a visit one day. In my culture, we have a saying, “Jaga silaturahmi selagi ada umur”. We shall maintain a good relationship as long as we are alive, especially with those who have made profound impacts in our lives. However, I am also well aware that the day might not come so soon.

Listening to the audio book during my commute to work. 14 November 2023.

In September 2023 through his Facebook post I learned that Sean will release a book about his story during captivity. At once I signed up to order a copy through my friend who lives in Sydney who already planned to go to Jakarta in January. By November, the physical book was released together with the audio book. I can’t wait ’til January to get my hands on the book, so I quickly purchased An Unlikely Prisoner in Audible. I started listening on my commute to work from November 14th due to release time difference. I remember I shed tears the first time I listened to his voice, which instantly brought me back to his lectures back in my university days. I felt like having a direct conversation with him. The way he told the story was utterly captivating and I can truly feel the personality I once knew. There’s a unique wit especially on the words carefully chosen to represent the situations and how Sean still managed to fuel the story with economics classroom talk.

The Book, as photographed by my friend upon collection from her local book store.

The storytelling stirred up my emotions from anger and frustration especially on the awful parts of his early morning arrest, “The Box”, the rats and the scorpions, the meal bucket, the confiscated reading materials, the endless inconclusive interrogation, the five times of catching Covid-19, the collective punishment of not having outside activities, the chains, and the list goes on; to a sense of relief that he received full support from his government, his family, our almamater Macquarie University, the Australian fellow academics, the diplomatic pouch, King Charles III and especially Jacoob (R.I.P); and to laughter specifically on the pseudonyms “The N.O.K and the liabilities”.

I knew I will enjoy the book and don’t need to wait until the end of my listening period to write a review for this audio book. At the end of the first day of listening, I wrote this:

Uniquely Sean!

A firsthand storytelling from a great man, delivered in just what I imagined it to be. The way the story is being read, makes me feel like having a live conversation. An Unlikely Prisoner is a story of bravery of a man, wife, daughter, family and friends, facing an unimaginable test of time. It’s a story on humanity. It brings back memories on the days where we held our breath for Sean’s return to Australia. This book filled the void to all of the questions arose in our minds.

I am a huge fan of Roald Dahl, especially on his “Boy and Going Solo” book, an autobiography of growing up and being an RAF fighter pilot. On one occassion I wrote to Sean, “One other impression of the audio book is that I felt like reading Roald Dahl’s Going Solo. He was injured during the war when he served in the RAF. Somehow your experience depicts similar circumstances. Hardship, strength and victory, and both are real experience. You had your incredible Ha, Roald Dahl had… the nurses. He was young and not yet married ”

As days of listening continues, I sometimes tagged Sean and his wife, Ha, through my Facebook Story with short messages like how clever they were on the N.O.K. and the liabilities, as well as how Matt Damon could actually be a good fit to play him instead of Danny deVito, if the book ever becomes a screen play. I am sure everyone can agree that Matt Damon already possess the intelligent and resilient persona required to perform as Sean.

The day I couldn’t believe what I hear and see. This photo was taken by my friend while the book was still in Sydney.

Then came November 29th, the day I disbelieved on what I was hearing as I reversed my car coming home from work. I thought I heard my name in the acknowledgement chapter, along with what it felt like 1000 other names. Me … one miniscule being who relied on prayers because I did not know how to help … On that, I quickly messaged my friend who, at the time, already collected the book. I asked her to open the book and look for my name in the last chapter. Anxiously waiting overnight, the confirmation came the morning after, and there it was, my name is really printed in the last chapter of An Unlikely Prisoner. Again, in an instant I messaged Sean, “For the love of God, how could you even remember to include me? ” I am deeply touched. I am left with no word to say. It felt like every word that might come out, will not equate of what I am feeling. It will just come out wrong. But if I have to say it now, what I felt lies along the words of modesty, humility and a lot of sense of humor still left in a person who was treated brutally unjust, yet can still be the kindest upon victory.

Up to this point, his Facebook posts were full of book signing and campaigning activities for the freedom of Myanmar around the globe, until one day I saw a post that said, “Next weekend in Singapore”, dated March 3, 2024. My heart felt like it’s struck by lightning, knowing that Sean will be closer to my city. I told my husband immediately, and he said, “Go! “. Oh my darling, how I love you so!

No, I’m not here for Taylor Swift.

Part II – The Reunion

For someone who always have a meticulous plan prior to any traveling, the rapid arrangement to meet up felt like a whirlwind.  Not only it was due in less than a week, the “Swiftnomics” added another monkey on my shoulder (and pocket). Determining on which day and time to meet, the time difference in communication replies, while plane ticket which rose to nearly 200 USD per hour almost felt like a dealbreaker and I heartbrokenly will have to postpone meeting the man who once a prisoner, turned to The Australian’s Australian of the Year and be the man who has met The King. With all calculated risks, I made the decision to just go for it, booked the plane ticket, and arranged with another good friend to stay over at her place during my stay in Singapore. After a few days of uncertainties, finally the sun shines on our side as I packed his book in my bag and get him to sign my copy.

Towards the end of my steps prior to approaching him, in my head I was trying to decide on what to say first, and it felt perfect when it finally came as, “There he is, in flesh! ” Ha ha ha .. I am still laughing over those words!

The most inspiring meeting at Orchard Road, Singapore 9 March 2024.

A little bit shy over 20 years apart, we felt mutual friendship quality that supports and respects each other. Inspired by the story in his book, the first time I did was gift him with reading materials. I brought him two Indonesian literatures. This Earth of Mankind by an Indonesian legendary author Pramoedya Ananta Toer, and The Rainbow Troops by a more recent best selling author Andrea Hirata. Plus, one other book by my mother about Demographic Bonus, as a gift from one intellectual academics to another, regardless of the language of the book it was written in. The books came with a hope that he will never run out of something to read again, and that the world needs people like him and “Bu Mus” from the Rainbow Troops.

Upon receiving my mom’s book, he pointed to a name so familiar to global audience, a name that belongs to none other than our beloved incumbent finance minister, Ibu Sri Mulyani Indrawati, as the one who wrote the foreword for the book, and said, “I have met her! She was also one of the persons who helped me get out from the country!” And funnily enough, I replied, “So do we!” (have met her, since both mom and Ibu Sri Mulyani are from the same almamater, The University of Indonesia.) Ha ha ha .. another unbelievably hilarious moment.

Beside the books, I have also prepared a tribute that was hastily written prior to the reunion on 9th of March 2024. I don’t usually write something that involves deep thoughts and emotions at the speed of light, but I assured myself that this has to be finished prior to the meeting. So, I began writing in the cloud through my mobile phone, in the yoga studio while waiting for a class to commence, during lunch break at the office, at home after work, convert the file to be accessible offline to finish on the plane, and finalized using my tablet in the taxi from the airport to the city center before meeting him. I knew perfection was far to reach, but at least the draft was ready, and the story line was complete.

It felt like he’s marking my essay!

Before other conversation began, I showed the draft for him to read, and he asked, “You’re not going to make me cry or anything, are you?“. “Well .. I can’t promise anything, but I can start to look for a tissue or two “, I replied. And I kept my silence while he read the untitled piece of writing. Even afterwards, we stayed quiet. Again, I am lost for words. Writing a tribute and have the person read it in front of me was priceless. All of a sudden the monkeys from Swiftnomics were gone, disappeared deep into the middle earth.

Initially, I asked Sean to title the piece, but then I used my author’s right to title it to be The Spark, inspired by George Joseph Stigler’s quote that is so near and dear to me. I vision this piece to be the first of a tetralogy, a history ‘herstory’ in the making.

We packed our conversations about two decades of our lives into two crowded hours, beginning with him telling the story about experiencing a super memory while in “The Box”, to how (information) noise has reduced that super memory ability. From my experience, I think Sean went into a meditative state where one is drawn into a super focus mental state, hence there was nothing else in between oneself and the focus or our breathing. And being outside the prison means receiving all sorts of noise once again, hence lowering the memory ability to focus. Sean also told the story on how “An Unlikely Prisoner” became the title of his book. Other thing we talked about was about work and life. But I was particularly curious on his meeting with King Charles III. He told the story about the invitation that sounded closer to “Do you mind if The King invites you to the Palace?” And I gawked and said, “How could anyone mind?” and he said, “No, I don’t think I would mind to the invitation from The King to come to the Palace“. And we laughed. Upon this, I remember that I had this in mind, to title The Spark as “Meeting the Man Who Has Met The King“, and we laughed because it did not sound right… at all.

As he went on asking for what’s next in my chapter of life, I stated my dream to give another go to pursue my PhD which has been long overdue, and for that I will need his support in an academic reference letter for me. This dream was relit in late February by my other good friend who informed me on Australia Award Scholarship opportunity, so I have not yet have a sound research proposal to share. But I have begun to form a slight idea on the topic and what it aims to achieve. And as a good mentor, he gave me his blessings and support.

Left: The Professor and I during my graduation in 2001. Top right: My last and best assignment as “The Artefact”. Bottom right: the seal from the patent registration office as the result of my initiation to register the company’s intellectual property right resulted from the innovation program that I lead.

During the meeting I also showed him one artefact from 2001, it was none other than the hard copy of my last assignment with him. The one that laid the pathway to my career in innovation. He was surprised that I still keep the piece. And I said, I only keep my best works which were this one and another one from my masters study. This old memory reminded him to tell me that he recently found a CD I gave him upon my departure from Australia. In it was Sarah McLachlan’s I Will Remember You in the hope that we may have good friendship in the future, because I will absolutely remember him. And the reunion confirmed that we are indeed remain good friends.

Towards the end of the meeting, we exchanged the story on how we met our spouses. How I met my husband, and how he met his wife. We hope to meet all of us, someday, at someplace somewhere on this blue planet.

Before saying goodbye, I casually said, “Oh, I am glad I don’t have any assignments to submit “, and Sean said, “Oh no you don’t, I expect one by 5pm today! ” And we laughed and parted our ways.

Along with the success of my mentee with her scholarship and acceptance at the university of her dream, the reunion has created a highly combustible ignition, or the “Umpfh” that relit my dream to pursue my PhD. Besides Stigler’s quote, these tetralogy titles are also inspired by my dad who is a fuel combustion engineer, who once taught me how to drive with an engine drawings rather than have me sit in the driver’s seat. I think Dad and I are just wired differently … With this ignition, I will do my best to attain “The Fuel” and forever be “The Flame” for the greater good.

Mission accomplished and my signed copy is coming home with me.

The Ignition is dedicated to:

Once again, Professor Sean Turnell for the 2 crowded hours that worth an age in me.

Mr. Nicholas Cope and Mr. Timothy Glover, for the challenging first words we have to explore 26 years ago. Let’s go sailing again, Sir!

Gita Sugiyanto, a.k.a. my friend for happily purchasing the book in Sydney and bringing it to Jakarta for me. I love you, girl!

Fitria Arsianti and Anissa Sudjatmiko, a.k.a. the other good friends for relighting my dream. Please keep pushing me tirelessly.

Adeline, a.k.a. another good friend, for letting me crash at your place during my stay in Singapore.

My Dad, finally dad … I can write something about you

And my darling husband who can always lit up my day!

said the woman I greatly admire, none other than my mother.

“Make yourself useful! ”

said my grandmother, the woman I spent my growing up years with.

Back in my youthful days, I could not comprehend what it meant. I lived my days just like any other young woman who was looking to put her dent in this universe. Big dreams, but struggled to understand what the world means… let alone how it works.

Prior to my higher education, my personal choice was to study Early Childhood Education, because I see teachers’ blood running in the family. My grandmother was a kindergarten teacher, my grandfather taught in an all boys elementary school inside the royal compound in Solo, my uncle was an English language lecturer in a university in Solo and my mother who is now in her 80s still teaches demography in University of Indonesia.

Top left: my grandmother, the way I see her until now. Bottom left: my mother in her professor gown. Bottom right: my grandfather in his teaching uniform. Top right: my grandfather with his pupils. Center: my grandmother with her pupils.

However, my dear brother rejected my idea by saying, “How are you going to make a living by being a teacher in this country?!”

I applied anyway, and got accepted into one of the universities in Australia for Early Childhood Education. But my fate was determined otherwise. My mother wanted me to study economics, which… was not my forte at any point in my life. (sigh..) My brother wanted me to study… well… anything other than education, and my father surrendered his voice to the both of them.

So off I went on to learn economics at Macquarie University in Sydney and life goes on with me struggling to pass economics subjects one after the other. Microeconomics 101, 201, 301, Macroeconomics 101, 201, 301, Public Sector Economics, Econometrics and so on and so forthnomics there were available to learn, until one day I had an excellent Econ 309 Professor who was very patient in explaining the basic concepts of economics that works for my brain. I repeat, for my brain!

My best economics assignment of all time.

Although unfortunately I met the Professor at the later stage of my study, I am still grateful that he was there to teach me, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to achieve my bachelor’s degree. With his guidance, not only my understanding improved, my grades also improved, but my interest to learn more about economics grew, until I even applied to pursue an M.Phil degree in History of Economics. But, my GPA was too late to improve, so I continued my study based on my other interest when studying Consumer Behavior with Professor Craig MacMillan. I grew my curiosity in understanding people and decided to pursue my Master’s degree in Marketing Communications at another university in another city.

Throughout my master’s study, from time to time I visited Sydney because I still have a lot of friends there. I also made time to drop by at the Professor’s office for a conversation or two, and years decades went by and we still keep in contact until one day he was captured and locked in as a political prisoner in Insein Prison in Myanmar for something he didn’t do.

During that time, I kept praying for his release day after day. I kept looking for the news and with help from my friends who were still in Australia, I got local news feeds, especially on the paid articles inaccessible to me. At times I had discussions with a good friend when there’s no news, and she wisely said that it could be a good thing when there’s no news. “I believe our embassy is working very hard to bring him back”, she said.

Every work I did since his imprisonment was dedicated to him, as a tribute and respect to the person who has helped me get through university. My best work during this time was when I stood in front of 200 children who were doing innovation projects for adolescent problems, commissioned by UNICEF.

In my element… teaching, children and innovation. The UNICEF project.

It was also the time where I had a chance to facilitate a creativity module for an international program with a Switzerland organization that aims to produce young changemakers in 12 countries across Africa, Asia, Latin America as well as some parts of European countries. This year marks my 4th year of involvement in the program.

Being a co-facilitator in this Young Changemaker program restored my faith where with this kind of young generation, the world will be in good hands. Through this program, the universe introduced me to a brilliant young lady who lives in the community where I will spend my post urban and office career days. She has become a good friend, and a very teachable mentee. She has that spirit and rare quality I seldom found in the (mislabeled) Gen Z.

Coming from a suburban area in Yogyakarta with no role model to push her motivation to the roof, she is a gem in the making. I told her that I am beyond proud and happy to have found her, and as with any of my mentee, I stated my purpose to help them throughout their journey, whether it is only during an innovation competition or for other purposes. “I am here when you need me. My doors are always open. If you are willing to do the work, any target you set will be achievable. If I can’t guide you, I will find somebody who can. Your window of opportunity is open wide and I believe that you can do it.” Gosh…. I feel like a coach!

Little did I realize, being a mentor brings back the memory where my professor said this to me, back in 2003, the year I left Australia for good. I clearly remember he said, “You could be like Megawati!” The incumbent President of the Republic of Indonesia. I said, “No way sir… that’s way too high up!“

However, that moment is deeply implanted under my subconscious and resonates until now. That moment encouraged me to pursue my exploration in teaching and being a mentor for the younger generation, that is not confined inside any walls.

Recently, the girl I met through the Young Changemaker program has now been accepted at University of Edinburgh, studying for a Master’s degree in education, on a state scholarship that is known to be hard to get.

When she thanked me, I said, “I believed in you, because someone believed in me first”. That someone has fueled me with a message of over 20 years old that I shall “Sound the clarion and fill the fife” which now has transformed to my own guiding principle in life, “May I be of use for the greater good “.

Upon my return, I asked almost everyone to write a message for me, including Sean. This message resonates very well until now.

Thank you Sean for igniting my curiosity to understand how the world works. May the world be kind to you and may you be blessed with health and happiness. May I be the channel to ignite many more curiosity and chances for young people to prosper, empower themselves and be of use for the greater good.

This writing was finished at 30k feet above Riau, enroute to Singapore in the morning of March 9, 2024.

Dedicated to Professor Sean Turnell, a.k.a. The Professor.
Dr. Ha Vu and Phuong, Sean’s wife and daughter who – through Sean’s book, The Unlikely Prisoner, taught me perseverance in faith, hope and love.
Gita Sugiyanto, Dr. Ariane Utomo, Professor Terence H Hull, and Graydon Smith – a.k.a. The good friends.
Professor Craig MacMillan who kept my curiosity to learn about humans.
Yessi, a.k.a. The girl.
Puspita, my partner to mentor Yessi. It’s our turn to continue our dream , girl!
Daniel Glinz for creating the Young Changemaker program that let the universe state my purpose of being in life.
And my dear husband who let me pursue my borderless dream. God has made us to complete each other with our little similarities and our big differences. God has never made a wrong decision when He arranged us.

Betapa bangganya aku terhadap Kartiniku. Bayangkan, Ia adalah sosok ibu yang disela-sela waktunya yang banyak diluangkan untuk bekerja, masih tetap mau mengajarkan kami untuk mengerjakan pekerjaan sekolah, mencari perlengkapan sekolah, bahkan ketika Ia bisa, Ia pun menyampul buku pelajaran kami sambil pelan-pelan mengajarkan caranya. Di waktu luangnya kala akhir pekan tiba, Ia suka membuat masakan yang tidak pernah cela di lidahku. Entah itu masakan percobaan pertama, atau pun masakan andalannya. Tidak pernah aku mendapatkan rasa yang mampu menandingi Ayam Pop, Pumpkin Soup dan Nasi Tim buatannya.

Di tengah-tengah kesibukannya untuk mengurus kami, Kartiniku masih mampu mendampingi sosok maskulin dan tetap menempatkannya pada posisi kepala keluarga. Kartiniku juga masih mampu merawat orang tuanya, dan masih mampu untuk tetap mengenyam ilmu bahkan sampai jenjang doktoral di usianya yang ke-lima puluh.

Sungguh bangganya aku ketika Ia dinobatkan menjadi seorang Professor perempuan kedua di sebuah fakultas yang terkenal maskulin dari sebuah Universitas yang bernamakan negara kami ini. Tak sedikit teman-teman sejawatnya yang sudah menjadi menteri dengan kesibukan bukan hanya mengurus rumah tangga domestik saja, tapi bahkan rumah tangga negara. Tapi, kami yang mencintainya selalu menghalanginya untuk maju sampai kesana karena kami tidak ingin beban pikiran, pekerjaan dan waktu pengabdian Kartiniku terlalu berat. Biarlah Ia berperan sesuai dengan keadaan yang terjadi. Kami sudah sangat puas dengan keadaan seperti itu. Maafkan kami jika kami jadi menghalangi langkahmu, Kartiniku.

Tapi .. siapa sih Kartiniku ini? Ia adalah ibuku.

Selamat hari Kartini, Ibu. Aku bangga padamu :’) Tetaplah menjadi Kartiniku selamanya.

*Sketsa dibuat oleh kakekku, Juni 1967.

Globally, we witnessed and experienced human evolution. We changed the way we work and the way we interact with each other, but one thing remained unchanged, is my gratitude to have you in my life.

2020 taught us how to love one another unconditionally. This year, we saw many people are challenged to survive, and behind all the struggles, we were shown the beauty of humanity, the support we give and receive as part of family and friends. Today, I am proud to say, “Well done, we’ve made it this far!”

Thank you for being a part of an important journey in humanity, thank you for your support during this difficult year.

Meow your Christmas be meowy and have a wonderful holiday season.

=======

That was my Christmas message to my dear friends and family. And now, as the day winds down, I felt a big hole in my heart because Christmas can never be the same again. There’s always that someone missing, someone we loved so dearly. It’s not the same anymore, because we can’t be together as extended family, we can’t freely visit or be visited by our relatives. But it has certainly taught me something, that is to appreciate the little things and be grateful that even it was only “just us”, my nuclear family is my whole world. And thank you God, you allow me to have Christmas with them today. And it was, beautiful.